Alien Abductions Incorporated  >>  Corporate Blog

Front yard crop circles have held a spot as one of our top Abduction Experience add-ons since their introduction in 1998 — they’re a great way to spark discussion of your interests with friends and neighbors!

Because we know how difficult it can be to design and execute even a small-scale crop circle, we here at AAI are extremely impressed by the work of this group of Oregon students. In less than 24 hours, these enterprising individuals created a crop circle that our own implementation team would be proud of. Our congratulations to all involved!

As we prepare to re-enable online access to the Abductalizer, we have been running a very large number of “edge case” tests on the Abductalizer itself and its related systems. Because so many people are interested in monitoring their Personal Abduction Analysis Factor, the Web-based interface has at times generated thousands of sessions per day, and it is important to us that we provide safe, reliable Abductalizer access to all of our clients.

This morning’s incident was very minor and posed no human or environmental danger. The fission product release was extremely small — insufficient to even activate the alarms of either the continuous air monitor or the gaseous stack monitor — and our technical staff was actively monitoring the Abductalizer at all times.

After reviewing the EALs in our emergency plan, our technical staff confirmed that the incident did not merit declaring a Notification of Unusual Event. We will, of course, assist the NRC and local authorities with their evaluations and prepare a full report assessing radiological dose consequences, but we fully expect these inspections to confirm our own findings.

We hope that this clarifies the situation for all interested parties. The Abductalizer will be restored to fully operation status shortly, and we look forward to providing you with online access soon!

Our thanks to those of you who have expressed your interest in Alien Abductions, Incorporated by subscribing to our RSS feed, signing up for our release notification list, and sending us email!

With regards to the Web site relaunch, work continues to go well and we expect to release the updated site at the end of September. We’ll continue to roll out exciting new features and functionality after that, as well, so keep watching here for Web site update notifications though the fall of 2007.

We here at AAI also appreciate the feedback that you’ve been providing regarding our tentative new offerings, but there are a few points that we should clarify. First, while our desire to combat the many misconceptions about the science of para-abductology has led us to seriously consider offering Abduction Experience guides for “do it yourselfers,” it is important to remember that AAI’s scientists, hypnotists, and memory implant technicians are very highly trained professionals: our staff is capable of implanting very sophisticated Abduction Experience scenarios that an amateur can not realistically expect to reproduce.

In short, we understand the interest in seeing our more popular scenarios made available in this DIY format, but it is unlikely that that “A Night on the Brooklyn Bridge,” “The Lambeth Road Conspiracy,” or “Tiajuana Puzzle” could be made available in this manner.

We’ve also seen a number of requests from individuals who have heard about our extensive audio-visual archive. While it is possible that we will make certain materials available online, we feel that it would be inappropriate to provide access to the more “explicit” films and recordings outside of a strictly controlled research environment. Again, we fully understand the interest in this material, but do not anticipate making it available outside of supervised sessions at our facilities.

Keep the requests and comments coming!

As the Director of Para-Abductalogical Research for Alien Abductions, Incorporated, I am always interested in methods though which information relevant to my chosen field of study becomes incorporated into mainstream culture.

During the 1990s, the combination of improved information access via networked computing systems (electronic bulletin boards, Gopher, the World Wide Web, and so on) and a notable shift in worldwide cultural perspectives that merits a full essay of its own at a later time (that shift being most immediately evident to the layperson in such popular culture phenomena as the television show The X-Files) led to an broad upswing in the availability of primary source materials relating to the systems underlying human belief structures.

In that vein, it is interesting to note that a CIA report on “brainwashing” has again gained popularity on the Internet.  While this ca. 1960 document is no longer of any significant research value to AAI (it has been studied extensively by our research team over the course of five years), and we have reason to believe that it may actually have been part of a disinformation campaign at the time of its release, it nevertheless represents an interesting window into the United States’ government interests during a formative period for current approaches to managing moderated consciousness.

In coming months I will be writing occasional entries in this Web log covering our research, as well as analysis of relevant or interesting current news items as they occur. I hope that you will find them both interesting and useful as a basis for your own work.

Hamilton J. Symmes

Greetings!

We here at AAI are looking for your help. As we revise and update our Web presence, we would like to know what products and services you would be interested in receiving via our Web site.

It goes without saying that online access to the Abductalizer will return, as will selected promotional products like our popular t-shirts, but we’d like to know what other offerings you would like to access from the comfort and privacy of your own homes.

Based on current client input, we are considering publications, audio guides, and an expanded line of promotional products:

• Home Abduction Experience guides for the DIY set
• Limited edition printings of the Classic Texts of Para-Abductology
• CDs of our pre-implantation orientation materials, for convenient at-home study
• Software downloads, including desktop Abductalizer access

If these products are of interest to you, or if you have another special request, please send us an email at requests@alienabductions.com to let us know so that we can offer the products and services that you are most interested in!

Yes, as many of our customers have noted, our efforts have been focused on areas other than our online presence for several years now. With all of the work that needed to be done improving our facilities, developing new abduction scenarios, and expanding the field of para-abductology, we were unable to give the Web site the attention that it really deserved.

Following an incident that was in no way related to a government seizure of certain corporate assets, the main Web site is currently offline. We see this as an opportunity, rather than a setback, however, and we expect to roll out a full, updated site over the course of the next few months — and that includes such favorites as online access to the Abductalizer, answers to your questions about para-abductology and its related disciplines, and (of course) information about our full line of exciting products and services.

We here at Alien Abductions Incorporated appreciate your continued interest, and look forward to our return to the Internet.